The thin line between insanity and dedication

I am still not 100% sure I know if I made the right decision this year.  I was given the opportunity to play softball again this fall.  Softball is sort of a passion for me.  I’m no stellar player, but I enjoy getting out onto the field and making the effort.  I was also given the opportunity to play soccer for my IBM team, but I chose to not play this year because I spent a good bit of last year with a variety of muscle injuries and scrapes and scratches.  I knew soccer could provide an injury that would hamper my race training and this year at least, the half marathon was the most important thing for me this fall.  Still, I am slated to run 5 days a week.  In order to do that and play softball, I had to be willing to get up early in the morning on game nights and get my miles in before work.  So, I was up at 5:45 this morning to get to the gym and start my run.  At least having shifted the long run to Saturday has made it easier to do this.  If I had to run 11 or more miles before I had to be at work for the day, I’d probably have bailed on one of the two.

Still, this begs the question for me:  Is it a sign of my dedication to endurance running or just a mild form of insanity?  I’m starting the training with only three weeks until the race and I’m fed up with running.  It feels like a chore.  It’s no longer the joy that I felt when I entered the 5K last October and stunned myself with my first 10K finish in February.  I’m annoyed, sore, and at times convinced I could do better to stay in bed.  Still, I get in the car, now before dawn, and drive to they gym to push my body when it’s still tight from a restless night’s sleep.

Some runs in the morning have been quite good though.  I recognize that I probably should have at least some calories, but I usually end up not eating before these runs, if for no other reason than I know I’m not likely to push myself into Anaerobic running and I won’t be converting raw carbohydrates into energy.  I should be able to consume fat stores to cook those calories, or at least that’s the theory.

I’m still doing my one mile kick at 30 seconds per mile faster than the base pace miles.  This morning, that meant 4 miles at 8:00 and one at 7:30.  I seem to have settled into that option and it makes me happy to find that even after increasing the total mileage I can still manage that last mile at a faster pace.  Maybe a kick isn’t out of the question.  That’s when I question my sanity.  I’m happy that I can abuse my body at the end of a distance?  It satisfies me to know that I can get in the required miles at 41 seconds per mile faster than the training program and still add in one extra mile another 30 seconds faster?  Hmmmm!

Cheers!